Our Sole Purpose

     Many times in life I seem to find myself wholly wrapped up in the work that needs to be done around me. I see find myself so focused on what i perceive to be God's calling on my life and the steps that I must take to get to that calling. I look at what needs to be done to obtain the future that I think God has for me and all the while neglect the one true calling that should be the primary calling in my life and that is to know God and Christ in a deep, personal, and intimate level. I love spending time in the presence of God and so many times I leave that place feeling refreshed and renewed; ready to go out and take on the world for my savior but there-in lies a problem. If I have to leave God's presence to go and save the world for Him then am I really doing anything good or significant? You see Jesus was led by the Spirit every where He went. That's what made Him who He was and it's what caused Him to be the man He was. I know that Jesus was more than just a man but was God incarnate but what we must remember is that He gave up that God status when He came down to us. He was no longer God in the sense that He had all this understanding and foreknowledge about what was to come. He was fully man and therefore had to be led like a man. So if Christ was fully man then how is it that He had more of an impact on this world then anyone before or since? It was because of the leading and guidance of the Holy Spirit in His life during His time here. He was led by the Spirit of God on where He needed to go, who He was to talk to, and who He was to touch. He never left the presence of God until the crucifixion.

     So how does this translate to our lives? How do we get to the place to where we can be in Gods presence everyday of our lives? I think that comes only with an understanding of this one simple concept: Our lives are not meant to go out and do His work, nor go out and save the world for the kingdom but rather just to simple live in relationship with Him. I believe that if more Christians simply focused on Christ and only on Christ then we would begin to see the world change. Christians would be some of the most loving, understanding, and non-judgmental people out there. If I am driving and get hit by another vehicle I can look  at that and understand that, as long as it doesn't hurt or affect my relationship with God, it doesn't matter. I can be shot, beaten, bludgeoned, maimed, paralyzed, or whatever and be okay because I know and understand that it will not break my relationship with Christ. If I failed at everything I did at life but still walked with God and knew Him in a deep and personal way then I will have succeeded (although I do believe that if we follow God as He leads us we will have more success and impact then if we tried to do it ourselves). Our sole purpose in this life is to just simply know God and to follow Him wherever He leads us. To simply say "God wherever you are, that's where I want to be. You're going to Taco Bell well then looks like I am going to Taco Bell, You lead me to Syria to minister to the jihadis well then I guess I am going to Syria." Think about it like this: There is a road ahead of you. Its long and seems to go for as far as the eye can see with many twists and turns along the way. You have no idea where this road goes and can see a ton of cut offs and side roads that lead off the main path. Some of those side roads even look inviting at times because the main road can get dull at one point and very scary at another but all along the way there is God. He started this walk with you as far back as you could remember and all along the way He has just walked beside you. There have been times in your life though that He has had to wait on the main road while you decided to go play on a side street before realizing that the side street led to a pit or a dark forest, or a carnival with evil clowns. He waited on you until you came back to the road. He looks at you and smiles and says "ready to go?" There have been other times where you look down the road and you pause as He takes a couple of steps ahead before pausing and looking back at you, assuring you it will be alright. As you walk this road you talk about life, about your future, your dreams, your fears, past and present memories, and everything in between. Along the way you have noticed bystanders just chilling out on the side of the road and God stops to place a hand on them and then looks at you to invite those people to walk with you. So you say "hey mister come follow and walk with me and this big man here and join in on our conversation and fun." Then finally when the road comes to an end at this HUGE gate and walls He stops and mimicking a captain on an airplane (Gods funny like that) says "We have arrived at our final destination. pshhh welcome to your new home. psshhh I hope you have enjoyed your travels with us this life time and look forward to seeing you again on the other side." After you both laugh you look around and for the first time notice all the people that have joined in on your walk. There are people as far as the eye can see to the left and to the right. They are all different sizes and colors and all have different stories about how and where God touched them and you asked them to join in the walk. You realize then that you had been so focused on building that relationship and enjoying the walk with God that you had never really gave much thought to just how many people you had asked to come with. Besides all you did was just ask a question after you saw Him touch the person...you just thought it was kind of common sense to ask because if He wanted them to join then they must be fun right? That is how in my opinion life with Christ should look

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God's grace knows no bounds. There is no line that it can not cross, no barrier it can not break down. How His sweet is His love that so readily fills and envelops up. It surrounds us and makes us strong. He is the one who has pulled us out from the pit that we so often find ourselves in. His love reaches down and stands us up and draws us out. He has filled us. He has given us new life with His blessed touch. Who can compare to the love of our God? Who can compare to His life defining mercy and grace. Let all the earth sing of His greatness. Let all the world shout His praise. May His love fill us as we live out every day of our lives. For-go the worries of this world and life oh people and draw near to the one who can wipe away every tear and wipe away every fear. Love Him oh you people and let Him love you back. Fill yourself with His presence, and let it captivate and draw you ever deeper. Love Him oh you people and let Him love you.

Out of the mouth the heart speaks and out of the mouth the flames fire forth ravaging all within range of the its insatiable appetite. The power to build, the power to destroy, the power of life, the power of death, so much power for such a little thing. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can always hurt me eternally. Be careful what you say for nothing should be seen as insignificant but rather a weapon of immeasurable destruction.

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Just as the grains are pushed back and forth among the plains so to is my heart always swaying with the hint of the breeze. Blowing one way one day and the other the next; never fully committed to one direction or the other. Balance and commitment elude me as battle lines form between flesh and spirit; war is raged on both sides pushing and pulling the heart every which way causing chaos and struggle that seems to never end. But you oh Lord see the playing field as a whole. You know the players and their pieces and see the battlefield clearly. You know that my heart remains a mess, full of angst and fear. You know of the truth behind the pain and know why i find it so hard to trust. Show me the truth oh Lord and grant me your favor. It is only in your presence that the battle is finally quiet, only in your presence where the war will cease. With you there is no struggle, there is no pain, only truth, only peace.

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Lord where are you, where have you been? Do you not hear my cry for you? Can you not sense my pleading for you and for your presence? Darkness ensnares and sin rages within me and all the while I call on you for salvation and aid but you remain silent. How long Oh lord will I have to put on this charade of being ok on the outside all the while knowing that death is merely inches away from my door? How long oh lord will you wait and sit idly by while I am ravaged by the cares of this world? Will you not come down and rescue? Could you not simply pluck me from travesty? Just a simple dose of your presence would be enough to satisfy my aching heart and revive it to what it once was. You alone oh Lord can save me and you alone oh Lord can set me free. I call on you asking that you save and set free, that you do what only you can do. It is only in your presence where I am made whole and it is only in your presence where sin becomes void. For you alone oh Father are the maker and lover of all and you alone oh Lord can set me free.

Less Christianity, More Christ

      When you look around at the church in America what do you see? Do you see a vibrant, joyful, peace and loved filled people who are completely sold out for what they believe or a people that go to church on Sunday and then abstain from His presence the rest of the week? Do you see a people living in true indescribable freedom not just from sin but from everything including the appearance box that we so often find ourselves or a people caught up in having to be seen as good and righteous all the time hiding that secret sin that eats away at their life destroying everything righteous within them? Do you see a people that are going out and giving all they have to spread the gospel and going out of their way to love and aid those in need not because of how it makes them look but because they see that person or group as truly loved and valued by God or a people who sees the homeless man and thinks "they got their because their lazy and if I give them aid all they're going to do is buy drugs"? Do you see a people who are willing to overlook the transgressions of the non-believer and pray for their enemies both personally and culturally (ISIS, Boston Bomber, Homosexuals, Abortion Doctors) or a people who hate and spit fire when they discuss such people and say things such as "I hope God punishes them, they deserve to burn" (Heads up: SO DO YOU and you would if not for the saving grace of God in your life). If you are being honest with yourself my guess would be that much of the time you would see the latter rather than the former. Now I am not saying that their are not those people out there who are the former but the American church in general is the latter.
     Now don't get me wrong I'm not saying I am perfect and if I am being transparent and open I would be inclined to say that more often then not I find myself in the second categories and much of the time I hate myself for it. I, like the American church, have made Christianity about me. How do I come across to people? Do I look spiritual enough, do I pray well enough, if asked could I quote enough scripture? Does my past achievements sell me as "holy and righteous" enough and all the while my heart is dying. I have taken God's precious gift and son and made Him an ACCESSORY to my life rather than a lover. I feel that when I accepted Christianity I just traded one set of shackles for another or better yet simply just ADDED chains to my already heavy burden. The chains of LAW, LEGALISM, APPERANCE, and OUTWARD RIGHTEOUESNESS were ADDED to the chains of SIN, GUILT, and SHAME and if that is what true Christianity is then I would have been better off without it. No wonder so many Christians lay down at night dissatisfied with their life, lacking the joy and peace that Christ talked about. No wonder we look up at the stars knowing deep down their has to be more. There has to be something deeper and more intimate; Something REAL.
     I am here to tell you that there is more and we can go deeper and are in fact encouraged to but many of us fear what it costs. I am finally to the point where I find myself willing to pay that cost, willing to give what needs to be given to gain the greatest thing my heart could ever seek and that is His presence and anointing. I am to the point where my heart screams "IM DONE WITH ALL THIS CRAP" and by crap I mean trying to always be and do what everyone wants me to. I am done with man's version of Christianity, done with outward righteousness and done with trying to keep my heart shackled under legalism. I am to the point where I am about to sell everything I have and just leave, travel Africa, and spread the Gospel through love. When Jesus sent out the disciples he told them to just go with what they had on their backs and nothing else; To eat what the people gave them and to stay with them, sleeping in the bed provided without complaint. Where are the people in todays church who are willing to just go without knowing exactly how they will get food or shelter??? You may think that's fanatical and crazy but did Christ ask for anything else? I am to the point where I am ready to go all out in worship not caring whether anyone thinks. I am ready to let go of my heart and let the heart that God has changed lead me.
     Maybe you are like me and are ready for something more, something real and intimate but you can't seem to find out how to get there. All I can tell you is that I don't have all the answers but I do know the first step is simple and is simply this: Go to God and let Him love you. Something He has been teaching me is that I can't fix myself which is a good thing because He never asked me to. All He asks is that I put myself in the best position to be loved by Him and to experience His love on a daily basis. Now that may mean getting rid of some things in my life that seem to hinder me from Him such as a relationship, alcohol, drugs, porn, or something as simple as a meal and He is not asking us to get rid of them simply because they are bad (which two of those are), but simply because they keep you from Him. He can not entertain sin and if we have blatant sin in our lives and heart then He may not able to fully fill us. He cannot fill what is already full but luckily for us its not entirely our obligation to empty ourselves. HE empties us. When we allow ourselves to be loved by Him and daily sit in His presence fellowshipping with Him not for what He gives but rather for who He is then and only then do we start to find that deeper intimacy we so desperately long for. All it takes is saying Jesus I am willing to surrender and let you love me and not just for a couple minutes out of the day but rather the entire day. Let that become your hearts cry and trust me the more time you spend in fellowship with Him the more that will be your hearts cry. So not it comes down to this: Are you willing?

Hope

"Hope is a good thing and no good thing ever dies"- Shawshank Redemption

         Hope. Such a simple word with not so simple meaning. Hope is what drives us during the rainy seasons. Its what makes the dark times bearable and the hard times beatable. Hope that with every dusk there will be a dawn. Hope that no matter the situation, no matter the pain, there is always a reason, always a lesson. Hope that even when we feel as if we cannot go on any longer and everything in life seems to have crumbled around us, we know that there is still a better tomorrow whether in this life or the next. As i have struggled and battled these past couple months I have held on to my hope. The hope that He is doing something wonderful. The hope that when this is all said and done I will look more like Him. The hope that when I finally see Him it will all be worth it. That's what I hope for. What is it you hope for? When you go outside and look up at the stars what do you find yourself wishing for? Maybe you are in a good place and you seem to have every thing you had ever hoped for and to you I say hold on to these moments, because if life has shown us anything it is that things change quickly and life never seems to stay perfect for long. So remember these times when life gets rough so you will have a tangible memory to hold on to. Maybe you are in a rough place like I am and life seems to be the exact opposite of what you had hoped for. To you I say hold on. Hold on to Him and the hope that He gives each and every one who calls on His name and know that no matter what happens you are loved and cared for; you are held close and treasured by the creator of the universe...what more could one hope for